Categoria: Uncategorized

Monogamy? In this economy?

Monogamy? In this economy?

I’m quite struggling with my feelings lately. I’m not sure what love looks like for me, right now. I broke up with everyone I was dating cause none of those people had much meaning for me. And now I’m left alone with my feelings and I’m really struggling with understanding them. 1. Monogamy Fucking what …

+ Read More

A day (part 2)

A day (part 2)

I wrote my plan at midnight before the day actually started. Now it’s ended. I love my friends! I do! The movie was phenomenal and I loved watching it with E., it was just as delightful as I expected. We caught up a bit and planned another movie night for when I get back to …

+ Read More

A day

A day

The moon is shining. I’m in Turin. I’m 27. I’m about to defy my family’s curse on me. I tattooed a Cleopatra on my shoulder blade to go the Egyptian museum. It’s a curse on a curse on a curse. I hope it will ease my relationship with myself and my aunt and everything. Then …

+ Read More

truth or consequences

truth or consequences

okay, so I told him. I was so convinced to just shut up about it, I did manage to tell him I’d miss him, like I’d hoped, and that should have been it. But then, yesterday, as I walked through the airport security I suddenly felt regret. Maybe it was the sudden realisation that I …

+ Read More

Idiot

Idiot

I am an idiot. I knew this from the start. I think I’m feeling something like jealousy, for the first time maybe. Maybe it’s more like envy or something I don’t know. But I feel this little pain in my chest every time she gets mentioned and I just enter this spiral of sadness. She …

+ Read More

Ego

Ego

I wish you were hereI wish I could share this with youI wish you could be here with usOr maybe I’m just cold andmiss the warmth of your bodyagainst mine

T. and C.

T. and C.

T. I’ve been thinking about her a lot, lately. I’m not really sure why. I know I do not want her in my life again, let alone near anyone in my polycule. But I can’t stop my thoughts, can I? And so I let my mind wander in the memories. Her place, her cat cuddled …

+ Read More

I’m not ready I want it

I’m not ready I want it

“I’m not ready for a relationship yet” is so much easier to say than “I want it with every fiber of my being”. “I don’t want this date to go well” is so much easier to say than “I long for romance and connection, I long for eternity and unconditional love and I don’t want …

+ Read More

Vore

Vore

Some time ago I read an article about kinky vore fantasies. I think I always consumed gore and vore medias, I’m not against it, but I’ve always thought about vore in gore contexts, in supernatural contexts. I’ve never thought about actually eating people that way. The article was about vore in a giantess-dom/small-sub fantasy with …

+ Read More

Singing voice

Singing voice

I have a very short audio note of L. singing. I listened to it and I breathed.I heard E. sing just last week and it just made me nervous. It’s batshit that I used to relax whenever I heard E.’s voice, his singing voice. Lately, it’s been “a fucking cheese grater” to cite Daniel Sloss. …

+ Read More